Don't Be Such A Jerk

I just got back from a 6 day long visit to work with our chapter at Texas A&M. I had the concept already in my mind for this blog before I left and then something happened on my flight home that reinforced the story I want to tell.

I'm in my seat (as is everybody else) and the flight attendant is standing next to me when this man gets on the plane. He starts to open the closed overhead bins when she interjects "If the bin is closed then it's full. It seems there is no room for your items so we'll have to plane side check them." This man then erupts into a fit of rage while he yells at her, calls her stupid, and then proceeds to open the bin above my seat (where my bag is). He says "I'll make room then!" as he starts aggressively cramming his bag into a space that had no room, he's insulting her and making sarcastic remarks like "Look there Lassie, looks like you're not very bright because I just made room. Oh my, that was so hard!" She, of course, maintained her composer and asked him to sit down. The other people around me were rolling their eyes and making comments about how inappropriate and rude he was under their breathe. As the 2 hour flight goes on, every time he is asked if he wants a beverage or asked to turn off his phone he is rude and loud and just out of line. We arrive in Detroit (layover) and of course he finds it necessary to leap out of his seat (before the seatbelt sign was off) and barge through others to get his precious luggage and start making business calls. It was then that notice the small luggage tag on his bag and it says "Residence Hotels, by Marriott." The next thought that crosses my mind is "Oh good God I will never EVER stay at a Marriott in this city and risk seeing him. He is such a jerk, how could he work in such a customer service oriented job? If he's the boss, I bet his staff hates him and if he's a staff member, how could the company allow him to stay if he acts like THAT!?"

It is then that I have this realization that in that moment I did what any other normal person would do - make assumptions and judge his entire company based on one jerks behavior. People do the same thing in Greek Life and with your chapters. There is some incentive to kicking out members who do stupid things or misrepresent the Fraternity or your chapter. If I had never met that man it's likely that I would have stayed in his hotel but now I pass judgement on not only his hotel but Marriott, who allows their employees to act like that. Maybe they have no idea how he acts outside of work but if they did I certainly hope they would fire him. Lucky for you, you're around your chapter brothers all the time, not just at meetings. You know how they act all the time, and it's your responsibility to hold them accountable. Don't allow jerks to stay in your chapter without repercussion for their behavior. This is a time when leaders have to manage and not just lead. I'll go back to my favorite analogy. If you need to buy eggs, you open the carton and if there is a cracked egg, you put it back and find a carton with no cracked eggs. Don't let your chapter be the carton that gets put back.

The men of Texas A&M were the antitheses of jerks. They actually have one of the most remarkable qualities that is so impressive in a person. They hear things that maybe they don't want to hear or don't agree with, they tell you how they really feel, you have conflict and then you walk out of the room friends and they still treat you with respect. So people - stop being jerks and treating people poorly who have to tell you what you don't want to hear. To better ourselves as people and as chapters we have to be open to criticism and change. Don't treat somebody like crap just because they are doing their job. You should strive to be mature, honest, gentlemen like the men of Texas Gamma Sigma.